Or, "This is why you shouldn't give Harry ideas"

[sniffnoy]

Ho hum... browsing through AIM profiles... and I see under Demosthenes36's "things that make me happy" profile "Whiteboard math".

(22:00:38) Sniffnoy: "Whiteboard math"? How does that differ from normal math?
(22:01:02) Demosthenes36: the math itself doesnt differ. only the medium on which it is done.
(22:01:29) Sniffnoy: oh
(22:01:48) Sniffnoy: well that's no fun - I thought it would be something like restaurant math or something
(22:02:27) Demosthenes36: haha...sorry to disapoint

Disappoint? *g* No, not at all... you just gave me an idea!

(This is still rather, um, not-very-revised. Suggestions would be welcome. So would hitting me on the head for ever writing such a stupid thing.)

Textbook math: π≠3. If x=π, then x≠3.
Blackboard math: x=3. x=π. Oh, wait, that's from a different problem.
Sleep-deprived math: π must be less than 3 because π-3<0.
Mental math: π=3.
Conversational math: I heard they passed a law somewhere that π=4.
Scratch paper math: π. 3. π-3. x. x=yπ+3. y<400. 56.
And finally,
Whiteboard math: This damn marker ran out!

-Sniffnoy

--
"If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life."
-Brooke Shields

Comments

LOL!

[thelostpenguin.livejournal.com]

back of hand math: pi + =

[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<something [...] 25.9>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]

back of hand math: pi + <hand crack and some black smear over it> = <something that looks like 25.9 but it may just as well be 710>

verbal overflow math (aka impress people with your lack of life or overboredom or math partyness in rm. 138 math):
person 1: pi
2: =
1: three
2: point
1: one
2: four
1: one
2: five
etc.. etc.. etc.. until the class dozes off or exhausts itself of hostile comments.

Have a nice Thursday!
~:O)

Re: LOL!

[thelostpenguin.livejournal.com]

That's so weird. My back of hand math got messed up. It should say after the plus something like
"Big black smudge, which looks a lot like 782 though it could just as easily be 1.05 = crack in palm with another smudge."

[ashleyisachild.livejournal.com]

how can "pi=3" be classified as "mental math"??
and how can that thing you said was conversational math be considered conversational math?
the rest of them make sense though.

[sniffnoy.livejournal.com]

Because if you have to approximate, and you have to calculate mentally, the easiest approximation is π=3.

Never get out of the boat.

[forcemajeure.livejournal.com]

"I love the smell of dry erase marker in the morning. You know, one time we had a classroom reserved for twelve hours, and when it was all over I walked up... We didn't find one of them, not one stinking geek body. The smell -- you know, that used-whiteboard smell -- the whole room -- it smelled like... victory."

Re: Never get out of the boat.

[ashleyisachild.livejournal.com]

wow! excellent adaptation!
humorous AND sensical!
five stars.

Re: Never get out of the boat.

[sniffnoy.livejournal.com]

Not having actually seen the movie, all I can say is: You reserved the classroom, and when the 12 hours were up, all the people had disappeared? Eh?

Re: Never get out of the boat.

[forcemajeure.livejournal.com]

I know; it makes no sense at all. Jungle warfare is like that.

"You understand, Captain, that this mission does not exist, nor will it ever exist?"

You've taken a serious wrong turn somewhere not to have seen the movie; it's one of the best things people ever did with celluloid.

"What the hell do you know about surfing? You're from goddamned New Jersey." -- Lt. Col. Kilgore