Or, "This is why you shouldn't give Harry ideas"

[sniffnoy]

Ho hum... browsing through AIM profiles... and I see under Demosthenes36's "things that make me happy" profile "Whiteboard math".

(22:00:38) Sniffnoy: "Whiteboard math"? How does that differ from normal math?
(22:01:02) Demosthenes36: the math itself doesnt differ. only the medium on which it is done.
(22:01:29) Sniffnoy: oh
(22:01:48) Sniffnoy: well that's no fun - I thought it would be something like restaurant math or something
(22:02:27) Demosthenes36: haha...sorry to disapoint

Disappoint? *g* No, not at all... you just gave me an idea!

(This is still rather, um, not-very-revised. Suggestions would be welcome. So would hitting me on the head for ever writing such a stupid thing.)

Textbook math: π≠3. If x=π, then x≠3.
Blackboard math: x=3. x=π. Oh, wait, that's from a different problem.
Sleep-deprived math: π must be less than 3 because π-3<0.
Mental math: π=3.
Conversational math: I heard they passed a law somewhere that π=4.
Scratch paper math: π. 3. π-3. x. x=yπ+3. y<400. 56.
And finally,
Whiteboard math: This damn marker ran out!

-Sniffnoy

--
"If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life."
-Brooke Shields

Comments

LOL!

[thelostpenguin.livejournal.com]

back of hand math: pi + =

[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<something [...] 25.9>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]

back of hand math: pi + <hand crack and some black smear over it> = <something that looks like 25.9 but it may just as well be 710>

verbal overflow math (aka impress people with your lack of life or overboredom or math partyness in rm. 138 math):
person 1: pi
2: =
1: three
2: point
1: one
2: four
1: one
2: five
etc.. etc.. etc.. until the class dozes off or exhausts itself of hostile comments.

Have a nice Thursday!
~:O)

[ashleyisachild.livejournal.com]

how can "pi=3" be classified as "mental math"??
and how can that thing you said was conversational math be considered conversational math?
the rest of them make sense though.

Never get out of the boat.

[forcemajeure.livejournal.com]

"I love the smell of dry erase marker in the morning. You know, one time we had a classroom reserved for twelve hours, and when it was all over I walked up... We didn't find one of them, not one stinking geek body. The smell -- you know, that used-whiteboard smell -- the whole room -- it smelled like... victory."

Re: Never get out of the boat.

[ashleyisachild.livejournal.com]

wow! excellent adaptation!
humorous AND sensical!
five stars.

[sniffnoy.livejournal.com]

Because if you have to approximate, and you have to calculate mentally, the easiest approximation is π=3.

Re: LOL!

[thelostpenguin.livejournal.com]

That's so weird. My back of hand math got messed up. It should say after the plus something like
"Big black smudge, which looks a lot like 782 though it could just as easily be 1.05 = crack in palm with another smudge."

Re: Never get out of the boat.

[sniffnoy.livejournal.com]

Not having actually seen the movie, all I can say is: You reserved the classroom, and when the 12 hours were up, all the people had disappeared? Eh?

Re: Never get out of the boat.

[forcemajeure.livejournal.com]

I know; it makes no sense at all. Jungle warfare is like that.

"You understand, Captain, that this mission does not exist, nor will it ever exist?"

You've taken a serious wrong turn somewhere not to have seen the movie; it's one of the best things people ever did with celluloid.

"What the hell do you know about surfing? You're from goddamned New Jersey." -- Lt. Col. Kilgore