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sniffnoyHere, then, is a summary of much of what happened this quarter: my minutes from all the house meetings. The beginning of each week has been put in bold to make it obvious where the separation is (if the giant "QUARTER 3 WEEK $week" didn't already accomplish that). Some of these will make more sense if read in the context of the other entries that were made around that time, and I probably should have posted these then, but oh well. Of course, some of these will not make any more sense when read in context due to me having omitted the relevant events from my LJ.
QUARTER 3 WEEK 1
There are waterguns on the table. Nobody fires them.
If a name appears without a specifier, assume it refers to the same person as
last time. If I use an ambiguous name without ever specifying, just try to
think of who I would be talking about.
--------------------------------------------
Elections:
Harry runs for secretary unopposed, wins
This goes into effect immediately and so I'm taking the notes now
Sean runs for president unopposed, wins
Mark runs for VP unopposed, wins
PTC: Girl Alex, Creepy Ian, Chris Powers.
IHC is the same as before, I think
--------------------------------------------
Announcements:
Quoth Bill:
Matt will not be returning as RA
He has been a good RA and we should give him a round of applause
People are needed to interview the new RA
We have 3 slots, but more are welcome
Sean says its a lot of fun, Alex is really excited
If you recognize a name and have an opinion, email Bill and Fiona
Friday, April 14th: WHIRLYBALL! 3 HOURS! $10! PAY TO BILL!
Tomorrow (by the time you read this it will be today, or too late):
Last O-Aide meeting
Looks good if you want to be an RA
Sunday, 9 PM: PIE STUDY BREAK
(Not pi study break, as I originally thought)
Sunday, 10 PM: THE RANDOMIZATION
If you are not there, you may end up very confused
May 2: THE LOTTERY (a misnomer, and probably not actually as important as the
randomization, but more important that you be there)
If you have questions, ask Bill and Fiona (points out Toney: or Sean)
403 and 406 will be singles next year
(Those rooms currently belong to Kate and Emily and Doug and Jim)
Room changes: Last day is this coming Monday, April 3
Saturday, 8PM: SPORTS FROLIC! In Henry Crown.
Bill gets a headache, Fiona continues in his place.
Quoth Fiona:
As for sports frolic: Remember, attendance counts, so be there!
Points out Marissa: Sports frolic collides with dance marathon! Oh no!
Also, May 10-14 is scavhunt.
Holy crap! There's a shard of glass in Bill's eye!
Lastly: trip ideas! Whirlyball is definite
Paintball at end of quarter?
X-men 3?
Aquarium?
Mark suggests: Dick's last resort (suggests inviting Henderson)
(Where food fights are legal!)
There's still Girl Alex's "gun trip" (as Bill puts it)
Matt suggests a camping trip to the Indiana Dunes, sleeping bags necessary
Mark suggests a camping trip to Cobb; Loretta thinks that's very Hitchcock
Quoth Matt:
The Shorey RA is putting together a "Midnight Soccer League" which will actually
play at 11 PM (points out Bill: "It ought to be called 'The 11th hour'"). 3
people are interested. We'll claim to be interested to keep our options open.
Quoth Colleen: There's a dorm tour on the 8th, 1 to 3:30.
Sean thanks all who came to the meeting.
Quoth Chris: A bunch of prospies are coming on April 5, he'll email about it
Quoth Marissa: She needs $120 for Dance Marathon, Bill will giving $10 to her as
well as Ben and Jason - if you like children, or don't like AIDS, give them
money! (But don't actually go to Dance Marathon, go to Sports Frolic.)
Quoth Ian: We once again have condoms, but no abstinence kits. Really guys,
you don't need equipment to *not* have sex. That's kind of ridiculous. I
don't-have-sex all the time, using absolutely nothing.
Bill makes a motion! Bill wants to pay $20 per week to kitchen wench to clean
the kitchen 3 times a week, an hour each time
Liz suggests $10 for 2, Mark suggests $5 for 1, Bill goes down to $0 for 0
But, Loretta asks, do we *have* that sort of money? Who knows?
We'll decide next meeting.
Hilary: Why can't people just clean up after themselves?
Ian motions that he get $5 for soap-buying, as the normal kitchen wench.
Uh... I just realized I didn't write down whether this motion passed.
I think it did.
Doors now have new closers. Some idiot with a screwdriver has been draining the
oil from the closers. If you see someone messing with the closers, says Bill,
ask them why they're so stupid! (Also, take a note of which house they're
from.)
If you want something fixed, try telling Bill - not only will he submit a work
order, he'll talk to the relevant people directly.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE/HERO OF THE WEEK: NONE
(end)
QUARTER 3 WEEK 2
If a name appears without a specifier, assume it refers to the same person as
last time. If I use an ambiguous name without ever specifying, just try to
think of who I would be talking about.
House snack is pizza.
--------------------------------------------
Announcements:
Emily Tancer is at house meeting! We have $837!
And we're selling T-shirts, on dates that I can't hear at all because she speaks
really fast! Just go see the sign-up sheets.
Also, we need posters/flyers. Not sure I heard all that.
Suggests Grant: We should announce it on Facebook.
Regardless, if Tancer has to make the flyer herself, she'll commit seppuku, and
she'll probably get it wrong and be terribly dishonored and her ghost will
wander Tufts House forever.
Says Bill: Sports Frolic this Saturday in Henry Crown! 20:00! Attendance
counts! Also Dance Marathon, but go to Sports Frolic! I'm using way too many
exclamation marks! (OK, he didn't say that. And you should still give money
for Dance Marathon.)
Whirlyball is now Saturday the 22nd
Says Alex: Fuck you, I am not a flake!
I need paper. Bill will give me a ream, and I'll return what's left.
--------------------------------------------
Facilities complaints:
Quoth Sean: What the hell is up with the paper towels in the 3rd floor bathroom?
Ian: There's all the problems with the lights...
Alex: Is that really a problem?
People: Yes!
Bill: We're not vampires here...
Grant: I think we need the tire swing back, for the sake of the lights.
Bill will get dim bulbs. Sam wants a clapper.
?: What about a hammock?
Bill is not amused.
Kate likes work orders. Also, the gray-stair doorway has a new closer.
The hole between Aaron and Ian Bailey's room was fixed.
Oh, it didn't actually go between their rooms, it was just inbetween their
doors. Also, there's now a doorknob on the lounge door.
--------------------------------------------
More stuff:
Says Sean: Also, any general facilities complaints in should be sent in to...
someone.
IHC rep (Colleen) is not here.
Mark resuggests Dick's Last Resort.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
New way of doing it - people will be nominated via the listhost, and voting on
at house meeting.
--------------------------------------------
Marissa needs $8 for Dance Marathon. Ian is now Superwench. Hilary would like
to get paid to clean the kitchen, and is even Hilary is willing to wear a wench
costume. Indeed, she even has one! We'll do a 2-week trial period, $10 a week,
3 cleanings a week. Motion passes. So who'll be the wench? Hilary doesn't
want it anymore. Ian will do it wearing a Batman costume.
Hilary doesn't like how much power Ian has, between being both condom czar and
kitchen wench. Also, there's now more abstinence kits. They include candy!
--------------------------------------------
BACK TO WEENIE/HERO:
I nominate Pavel for Weenie. Our assignment for CS was to write an
absolute-value function for integers without using any conditionals or loops,
and using just the operators +,-, and the bit operators, and to do it in as few
operations as possible. I initially got it in 6; Pavel said he had it in 2. I
didn't think this was possible. I soon got it down to 4 and then 3, and ended
up staying up till 3:00 AM trying to get it down to 2. I gave up and handed in
the 3-operation version. Turns out, he was actually just computing the
negation; it appeared to work when he tested it because he was calling the
standard abs() function.
Sean nominates me for Weenie for telling that story. I win pretty much
unanimously.
WEENIE OF THE WEEK: HARRY
Mark nominates Sean for Hero: Mark was trapped in the Reg, and Sean got him out.
Sean wins unopposed.
HERO OF THE WEEK: SEAN
QUARTER 3 WEEK 3
You remember about the names.
--------------------------------------------
Bill isn't here.
IHC rep Colleen: Does anyone wanna play the roommate game?
Apparently it's like the Newlyweds.
No, nobody does.
Girl Alex tells people not to go to RM functions.
Toney suggests we get an official vote to confirm this; Sayer says going and
eating their food is better. Alex agrees.
The T-shirts will be coming in.
Says Chris: You don't really have to do anything for your prospie, just give
them a place to sleep. Also, points out Toney, they're like pets. Email Chris
about prospies.
Quoth Sean: Propies are fun to play with, and you can use them as a selection
process - if you don't want them to come, be an ass and lock them out!
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Mark is not present, but he nominated Matt via email. What's going on with
that?
I nominate Mark, because his email makes him sound much more the weenie than
Matt. He ends up winning by default as nobody cares about the Matt nomination.
HERO OF THE WEEK:
Sean nominates Bill for sticking up to housing and losing his job for it.
Someone nominates Sean, but apparently we can't talk for it. Bill wins.
--------------------------------------------
There are brownies. The end.
QUARTER 3 WEEK 4
You remember about the names.
--------------------------------------------
Says Bill: Whirlyball, this Saturday! Give him money if you haven't already.
NEW RA: Blake Langdon will be the new RA. Hooray!
No, we did not think she was weak!
No, she was not the one everyone except Chris hated!
She's a swimmer.
We now have like $2000. w00t!
Do we want paintball, or an outrageously large television?
...or cable for the lounge?
As for illegal cable, Bill *has* discussed it with Sayer.
It would, in fact, be fairly difficult (though possible).
But Jim Wessel wouldn't like it. Also, if a guy comes to inspect for legal
cable, and he finds illegal cable, the result will be badness.
It is suggested that this goes to PTC, because cable is better than Medieval
Times. (They didn't even have *TV* in medieval Europe, much less cable). It'll
be $150 a month.
Quoth Ian, in no particular order (certainly not *this* order, though it really
is the order he said it in (I said he should said it all simultaneously, but
no...)):
1. The Superwench trial period has ended. (Really it's Batwench, but...) Will
it continue? Motion fails. No more Superwench.
2. PTC: Spamalot! 4 tickets per house! Also, White Sox, Monday 9th! You pay
$3!
3. There is no 3.
There is Superwench confusion. The motion did, in fact, fail.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Nominees:
Loretta
Armoskus
Loretta "passes" (i.e. wins).
Chris nominates self for hero.
The nomination is rejected by the mob. No hero!
Wait! Kate nominates Girl Alex for getting people to take off their pants! She wins!
QUARTER 3 WEEK 5
--------------------------------------------
Bill wants to tell us a few things, then he will leave. Then he will have to go
up to the Thompson House house meeting because their RHs are leaving this
weekend, and it will be collectively RHed by the other RHs.
Thompson kids may start coming to our study breaks, like orphans. (Which will
be melted down and properly grounded.)
Tuesday, 8 PM, May 2: THE LOTTERY - you must have your pink housing card.
Except for Kate. Except not. You don't have to fill it out, just bring it. If
you lose it before Monday, go to the housing office; if you go on Monday or
Tuesday, they will laugh at you.
Thursday, 7:30 PM - Pierce lottery. This is the place to go if you want to
defect to another house, traitor.
May 9, 10 - 8 PM - general lottery.
Oh, Henderson RHs are leaving too. That means Shorey RHs are the only ones
staying.
Final HARK (sp?) meeting will be May 15, HARK officers will be elected for next
year.
Nobody cares about IHC's "roommate game". It's really stupid.
Chris the RM will be leading a trip to the Oriental institute. He's very
knowledgeable about near-East stuff. Saturday May 6 11 AM. Then an open house
May 19 at 4:30. Go there and do tricks! Or something.
"Race, culture, and civility" will be an experimental Chicago Life meeting that
will be held next year. If you want to subject the incoming first years to
this, tell Bill.
The Fire Marshal is coming! Get stuff out of the hall unless you want him to
come by again!
So... Brazilian Jujitsu? Bill can't teach us himself ( :( ), but he can get us
instructors. He taught Alex some moves, and she had to register her right hand
because now it's a Lethal Weapon.
Bill leaves, Sean takes over.
PTC: They did nothing. Spamalot sheet is still up.
You can ask Colleen about the discipline system or the lottery. Or about the
roommate game, though I would advise against that.
A New Day and Hollie won the election. Boo.
Alex: We have $500 not yet in the bank that the University can't stop us from
using (they don't spend money on "dangerous things"). We could go next saturday
at 7 PM. It'd be about $20 or $25 per person. Or Sunday at 3. Check the
listhost. Email Alex if you have questions.
Quoth Ensu (sp?): She's running a study, it takes 2 minutes to complete and
pays a dollar. Honestly, I thought it was confusing. She lived in Tufts last
year, by the way.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Sean nominates Lulu! Lulu hates Sean and tells Colleen to hit him. Lulu leaves
the room before the story is told. Lulu was talking to Emily and Maria. "Don't
you think that skirt's a little short, Lulu? If you're dancing on the table,
people might see a little too much." "If I'm dancing on the table, I won't
really care." Well, at Psi U, Lulu was dancing on the table, fell off, and her
skirt fell off as well! She had to be escorted out.
No other nominations, Lulu wins.
HERO OF THE WEEK:
Ian makes a stupid nomination for himself. I won't even say what it is.
Toney suggests the Lulu Care Team; it wins unopposed.
--------------------------------------------
House meeting is over, but nobody disperses.
QUARTER 3 WEEK 6
Girl Alex is here first (except for me) and wants to start without anyone else.
There is actually house snack!
--------------------------------------------
Bill asks: Does anyone else (i.e. other than him himself) want to plan
paintball?
Announcement by Elibet: Does anyone have a blank cassette? (That's more of a
question, but...)
Sean throws a (nonempty) soda bottle in response. She throws it back, doesn't
even nearly hit.
PTC: There are still only 3 Tuftsians going to Spamalot. If you want to go to a
White Sox game with 20 people from Henderson, it's only $3. It's Monday of 8th
week.
IHC: The dining hall be redesigned. Does it really matter? Probably not. They
have promised to bring the food up to par with the other dining halls (Pierce
has consistently ranked lowest), but I remain skeptical.
Grant points out that the dining hall will be black-and-white next year.
Bill says the kitchen will be open, so you can see what they're doing to your
food. I assume this was a joke, but Mark believed it.
Email Aaron of Shorey (Aaron Shorey?) if you want to apply to manage TANSTAAFL;
eventually it will be voted on.
$40 are allocated for food bought at Whirlyball, Bill also wants $10 to pay back
Sean; the latter fails.
Says Boy Alex: Since the weather is getting nice, anyone want to picnic?
Bill suggests the point; Mark suggests North Field.
Kate says it will be sunny tomorrow; $50 are allocated for a barbeque tomorrow.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Apparently there's a story about May that can't be told.
Michael Toney nominates Kenneth. Kenneth went to a party at Shoreland with some
hot girls, makes himself about 5 mixed drinks, each about half alcohol. He
somehow makes his way back to Tufts. He says repeatedly, "Dude, I'm not
supposed to be this drunk!" Sayer asks him if he'll remember this in the
morning; he says there's about a 75% chance. Then he starts shouting
percentages at people. "Mark, you get 85%!" "What percentage do I get?" "You
get 60%!" He tries to play Smash but all he can do is press the start button.
Sometime later Toney finds him in a bathroom stall, throwing up. He brags about
how he's never thrown up anywhere he's not supposed to; he then passes out.
Michael realizes this, wakes him up, but Kenneth doesn't want to leave. "It's
so comfortable! It hurts to move..." So Toney starts climbing over the wall to
get him out. Kenneth, realizing this, slides out underneath, leaving the stall
locked behind him; it remained locked for several days thereafter. Also, the
next day, 12 hours later, he was still drunk. "Did I take my clothes off before
or after Michael Toney left?" After.
Even so, Mark nominates Toney for undressing Kenneth. Mark also nominates the
Bears for their draft picks. Kenneth wins by a landslide.
Something is said about May; I can't make it out and it gets no votes.
HERO OF THE WEEK:
Kyle is nominated for his blood drive; Sean refuses to acknowledge this,
insisting it's a pyramid scheme run by Dracula. Michael was nominated for
taking care of Kenneth. Kyle wins.
--------------------------------------------
Someone has been stealing things and sliding them through the grate into the
beer room. Also, there is a shaft in the beer room that runs from this floor up
to the 10th!
I think I missed a bunch of stuff.
Hilary won't donate her blood, but she'll sell it. Sean points out that she's
selling her body.
I really think I missed a bunch of stuff. In fact I'm deliberately ignoring
this, too much is being said. However, Grant insists I record the following:
Bill: I got $5 on me; if you can give me a pint of blood, I don't care how you
get it out of you.
Grant suggests that the X-Men theme be the official house theme. Hilary (?)
suggests Since You've Been Gone. I suggest Gourmet Race 1 from Kirby Superstar.
This falls apart but it becomes suggested that next year the house shirt read
"Just one more game."
QUARTER 3 WEEK 7
House snack is chips, thanks to Sean.
--------------------------------------------
SIGN UP FOR PAINTBALL! The most important announcement of this meeting, hands
down. It's Sunday the 28th. Note that we have the 29th off.
The tire swing hole will be fixed over the summer.
Bill: Fiona and I have air conditioning now, so when it gets too damn hot, don't
come near our apartment.
Rachel: Saturday and Sunday, 8:00, burlesque show. Rachel is in it. "I don't
know how much it is, but it's probably fairly cheap." Also, 19th and 21st,
there's some sort of dance show, $7.
Sean: Rachel's a hooker who wants to be a dancer.
Ian: White Sox game - if you signed up, you need to talk to Ian.
Kate is confused.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK
Sean: Do we even need to hold a vote?
Sam is additionally nominated, just for show.
Chris still wins with no vote.
HERO OF THE WEEK
Jacob, again with no vote.
--------------------------------------------
Also, remember, it's ScavHunt, everyone! http://mcp.rh/ for the current status.
QUARTER 3 WEEK 8
--------------------------------------------
Bill: They have steam-cleaned the carpets, yay.
Sean: It still smells funny and it's still mildewy.
Ian Bailey isn't staying for house meeting.
Paintball is the Sunday of Memorial Weekend.
Bill makes a PROMISE:
If, in the last week that you are here, no-one gets kicked out of housing,
no-one does anything that makes Fiona and I totally crazy, I *will* moon the
housing office.
(Remember, that's a promise!)
Pavel: Can we all moon the housing office?
Sean: Sure, do it every day as you go to class!
PTC: Every Tufts person has backed out of every single event.
The new TANSTAAFL manager's name is Calvin. Apparently Toney was going to live
with him.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Other Sean wins Weenie of the Week, no contest.
HERO OF THE WEEK:
Emily Feldman, for turning off the water on Friday. Also Lucas and Hilary, for
doing the same on Thursday. Again, no need for a vote.
QUARTER 3 WEEK 9
Mark brings Depot!
--------------------------------------------
Oh crap! I'm late! Well, all the announcements I missed will be repeated next
week. They regard moving out, SFAICT.
Paintball, Saturday: Probably $10 per person? Bring money to buy ammo.
7:30 AM we are leaving! Get up and get on the bus, you can sleep on the bus.
The bus will be on University Avenue. Lunch is involved somehow.
NEW RHs: Bill (no, not the same Bill) and Dave. Yes, they're a gay couple.
Bill (current Bill): Everything bad about you I'm telling them, and making up a few stories.
One of them is a *real doctor*. The other is working towards some sort of PhD
(in Kicking Your Ass, perhaps?). Unfortunately, though Alex is stalking them,
she's not allowed to tell us anything.
Emily Tancer: We have $1811, yay! And we're *still* selling T-shirts (whoops,
almost wrote "teachers" there). 2-hour shifts.
Ian: Can I get reimbursed for the air freshener? (No.) Also, somebody stole my
carpet.
Aaron has ordered 4 new controllers, yay! Reimbursed.
Jacob says he wants more Yobos.
As for camping... after a bunch of noise, it fails.
No No-Holds-Barred-Fighting classes on house money, unfortunately; even though
it's self-defense, it's still too dangerous.
The unofficial T-shirts should be in tomorrow.
Sean will make donuts! Hooray! But when? Monday at 22:00!
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Sean nominates Chris for vomiting on Psi U's window.
Any other stories? Nope. Chris's story is lame but it's all we have; win by
default.
Hilary nominates Mark for hero, firstly for bringing Depot, secondly for going
home with a third-year Friday night.
Mark: Her name's Depot.
Kenneth: Actually, it's The Football.
--------------------------------------------
T-shirts must be sold as we are in debt! Oh no! I don't understand how it is
that we both have $1811 *and* are in debt, but whatever...
QUARTER 3 WEEK 10
Bill insists that the new RH is getting a PhD in History, not Kicking Your Ass.
RHs do not get successively tougher.
You must be out on 3 PM on Saturday 10 June! Last meal Friday 9 June!
If you have stuff in storage, you have to get it out of storage now (then put it
back afterward). There will be specific storage hours - if you're not living
here next year, you cannot store stuff here! You can't store stuff in Tufts's
storage room, construction workers will steal it.
Ben says: X-men!
You will give the desk clerk your name and she will sign you out on the
computer. You have to clean your room, also - if your room is found to be too
dirty, you will be charged $25 minimum. This is a new policy. Lock your
windows and doors.
Bill: You guys are letting Ben steal your microwave. I have no vested interest
in this. He can take it and pee on it so far as I care.
Ben: Yes!
Doug: Can we throw it off the parking garage that might be across the street?
Bill: Why are you making *that* the hypothetical? I *know* that the parking
garage is across the street.
Says Sean: PTC closed out the year, nothing much happened. Sean would also like
to apologize for the closing of TANSTAAFL, it's out of his control, his
employees just chose not to show up. It'll be back open come Sunday.
Doug: Ben, if you don't stop pushing that goddamn button I'm going to come down
there and rip your fucking hand off.
Why aren't the new RHs here? One's on the other side of the country, and one's
a douche.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Chris Powers nominates Ben for his microwave antics.
Doug nominates May for Paintball. Bill and May approach Pavel, the only one
left on his team, from behind. Bill points his gun at Pavel and tells him to
surrender. Pavel responds by getting shot by May.
Ben wins.
HERO OF THE WEEK:
Ben wants to nominate himself for going to a wedding. WTF?
Doug announces that if you don't have your "Where sobriety comes to die" shirt,
come to him and get it.
A bunch of people leave, I think the meeting's over... but apparently not, as
Boy Alex nominates Vivian for helping him with his music final. Yay, we have a
winner.
Holy crap! Ben just put a VHS cassette in the microwave! For like 3 minutes!
Ben insists it smells like popcorn.
Kenneth: Oh God, it's smoking!
Chris stops it with a minute left.
(There was no house meeting finals week.)
-Sniffnoy
QUARTER 3 WEEK 1
There are waterguns on the table. Nobody fires them.
If a name appears without a specifier, assume it refers to the same person as
last time. If I use an ambiguous name without ever specifying, just try to
think of who I would be talking about.
--------------------------------------------
Elections:
Harry runs for secretary unopposed, wins
This goes into effect immediately and so I'm taking the notes now
Sean runs for president unopposed, wins
Mark runs for VP unopposed, wins
PTC: Girl Alex, Creepy Ian, Chris Powers.
IHC is the same as before, I think
--------------------------------------------
Announcements:
Quoth Bill:
Matt will not be returning as RA
He has been a good RA and we should give him a round of applause
People are needed to interview the new RA
We have 3 slots, but more are welcome
Sean says its a lot of fun, Alex is really excited
If you recognize a name and have an opinion, email Bill and Fiona
Friday, April 14th: WHIRLYBALL! 3 HOURS! $10! PAY TO BILL!
Tomorrow (by the time you read this it will be today, or too late):
Last O-Aide meeting
Looks good if you want to be an RA
Sunday, 9 PM: PIE STUDY BREAK
(Not pi study break, as I originally thought)
Sunday, 10 PM: THE RANDOMIZATION
If you are not there, you may end up very confused
May 2: THE LOTTERY (a misnomer, and probably not actually as important as the
randomization, but more important that you be there)
If you have questions, ask Bill and Fiona (points out Toney: or Sean)
403 and 406 will be singles next year
(Those rooms currently belong to Kate and Emily and Doug and Jim)
Room changes: Last day is this coming Monday, April 3
Saturday, 8PM: SPORTS FROLIC! In Henry Crown.
Bill gets a headache, Fiona continues in his place.
Quoth Fiona:
As for sports frolic: Remember, attendance counts, so be there!
Points out Marissa: Sports frolic collides with dance marathon! Oh no!
Also, May 10-14 is scavhunt.
Holy crap! There's a shard of glass in Bill's eye!
Lastly: trip ideas! Whirlyball is definite
Paintball at end of quarter?
X-men 3?
Aquarium?
Mark suggests: Dick's last resort (suggests inviting Henderson)
(Where food fights are legal!)
There's still Girl Alex's "gun trip" (as Bill puts it)
Matt suggests a camping trip to the Indiana Dunes, sleeping bags necessary
Mark suggests a camping trip to Cobb; Loretta thinks that's very Hitchcock
Quoth Matt:
The Shorey RA is putting together a "Midnight Soccer League" which will actually
play at 11 PM (points out Bill: "It ought to be called 'The 11th hour'"). 3
people are interested. We'll claim to be interested to keep our options open.
Quoth Colleen: There's a dorm tour on the 8th, 1 to 3:30.
Sean thanks all who came to the meeting.
Quoth Chris: A bunch of prospies are coming on April 5, he'll email about it
Quoth Marissa: She needs $120 for Dance Marathon, Bill will giving $10 to her as
well as Ben and Jason - if you like children, or don't like AIDS, give them
money! (But don't actually go to Dance Marathon, go to Sports Frolic.)
Quoth Ian: We once again have condoms, but no abstinence kits. Really guys,
you don't need equipment to *not* have sex. That's kind of ridiculous. I
don't-have-sex all the time, using absolutely nothing.
Bill makes a motion! Bill wants to pay $20 per week to kitchen wench to clean
the kitchen 3 times a week, an hour each time
Liz suggests $10 for 2, Mark suggests $5 for 1, Bill goes down to $0 for 0
But, Loretta asks, do we *have* that sort of money? Who knows?
We'll decide next meeting.
Hilary: Why can't people just clean up after themselves?
Ian motions that he get $5 for soap-buying, as the normal kitchen wench.
Uh... I just realized I didn't write down whether this motion passed.
I think it did.
Doors now have new closers. Some idiot with a screwdriver has been draining the
oil from the closers. If you see someone messing with the closers, says Bill,
ask them why they're so stupid! (Also, take a note of which house they're
from.)
If you want something fixed, try telling Bill - not only will he submit a work
order, he'll talk to the relevant people directly.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE/HERO OF THE WEEK: NONE
(end)
QUARTER 3 WEEK 2
If a name appears without a specifier, assume it refers to the same person as
last time. If I use an ambiguous name without ever specifying, just try to
think of who I would be talking about.
House snack is pizza.
--------------------------------------------
Announcements:
Emily Tancer is at house meeting! We have $837!
And we're selling T-shirts, on dates that I can't hear at all because she speaks
really fast! Just go see the sign-up sheets.
Also, we need posters/flyers. Not sure I heard all that.
Suggests Grant: We should announce it on Facebook.
Regardless, if Tancer has to make the flyer herself, she'll commit seppuku, and
she'll probably get it wrong and be terribly dishonored and her ghost will
wander Tufts House forever.
Says Bill: Sports Frolic this Saturday in Henry Crown! 20:00! Attendance
counts! Also Dance Marathon, but go to Sports Frolic! I'm using way too many
exclamation marks! (OK, he didn't say that. And you should still give money
for Dance Marathon.)
Whirlyball is now Saturday the 22nd
Says Alex: Fuck you, I am not a flake!
I need paper. Bill will give me a ream, and I'll return what's left.
--------------------------------------------
Facilities complaints:
Quoth Sean: What the hell is up with the paper towels in the 3rd floor bathroom?
Ian: There's all the problems with the lights...
Alex: Is that really a problem?
People: Yes!
Bill: We're not vampires here...
Grant: I think we need the tire swing back, for the sake of the lights.
Bill will get dim bulbs. Sam wants a clapper.
?: What about a hammock?
Bill is not amused.
Kate likes work orders. Also, the gray-stair doorway has a new closer.
The hole between Aaron and Ian Bailey's room was fixed.
Oh, it didn't actually go between their rooms, it was just inbetween their
doors. Also, there's now a doorknob on the lounge door.
--------------------------------------------
More stuff:
Says Sean: Also, any general facilities complaints in should be sent in to...
someone.
IHC rep (Colleen) is not here.
Mark resuggests Dick's Last Resort.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
New way of doing it - people will be nominated via the listhost, and voting on
at house meeting.
--------------------------------------------
Marissa needs $8 for Dance Marathon. Ian is now Superwench. Hilary would like
to get paid to clean the kitchen, and is even Hilary is willing to wear a wench
costume. Indeed, she even has one! We'll do a 2-week trial period, $10 a week,
3 cleanings a week. Motion passes. So who'll be the wench? Hilary doesn't
want it anymore. Ian will do it wearing a Batman costume.
Hilary doesn't like how much power Ian has, between being both condom czar and
kitchen wench. Also, there's now more abstinence kits. They include candy!
--------------------------------------------
BACK TO WEENIE/HERO:
I nominate Pavel for Weenie. Our assignment for CS was to write an
absolute-value function for integers without using any conditionals or loops,
and using just the operators +,-, and the bit operators, and to do it in as few
operations as possible. I initially got it in 6; Pavel said he had it in 2. I
didn't think this was possible. I soon got it down to 4 and then 3, and ended
up staying up till 3:00 AM trying to get it down to 2. I gave up and handed in
the 3-operation version. Turns out, he was actually just computing the
negation; it appeared to work when he tested it because he was calling the
standard abs() function.
Sean nominates me for Weenie for telling that story. I win pretty much
unanimously.
WEENIE OF THE WEEK: HARRY
Mark nominates Sean for Hero: Mark was trapped in the Reg, and Sean got him out.
Sean wins unopposed.
HERO OF THE WEEK: SEAN
QUARTER 3 WEEK 3
You remember about the names.
--------------------------------------------
Bill isn't here.
IHC rep Colleen: Does anyone wanna play the roommate game?
Apparently it's like the Newlyweds.
No, nobody does.
Girl Alex tells people not to go to RM functions.
Toney suggests we get an official vote to confirm this; Sayer says going and
eating their food is better. Alex agrees.
The T-shirts will be coming in.
Says Chris: You don't really have to do anything for your prospie, just give
them a place to sleep. Also, points out Toney, they're like pets. Email Chris
about prospies.
Quoth Sean: Propies are fun to play with, and you can use them as a selection
process - if you don't want them to come, be an ass and lock them out!
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Mark is not present, but he nominated Matt via email. What's going on with
that?
I nominate Mark, because his email makes him sound much more the weenie than
Matt. He ends up winning by default as nobody cares about the Matt nomination.
HERO OF THE WEEK:
Sean nominates Bill for sticking up to housing and losing his job for it.
Someone nominates Sean, but apparently we can't talk for it. Bill wins.
--------------------------------------------
There are brownies. The end.
QUARTER 3 WEEK 4
You remember about the names.
--------------------------------------------
Says Bill: Whirlyball, this Saturday! Give him money if you haven't already.
NEW RA: Blake Langdon will be the new RA. Hooray!
No, we did not think she was weak!
No, she was not the one everyone except Chris hated!
She's a swimmer.
We now have like $2000. w00t!
Do we want paintball, or an outrageously large television?
...or cable for the lounge?
As for illegal cable, Bill *has* discussed it with Sayer.
It would, in fact, be fairly difficult (though possible).
But Jim Wessel wouldn't like it. Also, if a guy comes to inspect for legal
cable, and he finds illegal cable, the result will be badness.
It is suggested that this goes to PTC, because cable is better than Medieval
Times. (They didn't even have *TV* in medieval Europe, much less cable). It'll
be $150 a month.
Quoth Ian, in no particular order (certainly not *this* order, though it really
is the order he said it in (I said he should said it all simultaneously, but
no...)):
1. The Superwench trial period has ended. (Really it's Batwench, but...) Will
it continue? Motion fails. No more Superwench.
2. PTC: Spamalot! 4 tickets per house! Also, White Sox, Monday 9th! You pay
$3!
3. There is no 3.
There is Superwench confusion. The motion did, in fact, fail.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Nominees:
Loretta
Armoskus
Loretta "passes" (i.e. wins).
Chris nominates self for hero.
The nomination is rejected by the mob. No hero!
Wait! Kate nominates Girl Alex for getting people to take off their pants! She wins!
QUARTER 3 WEEK 5
--------------------------------------------
Bill wants to tell us a few things, then he will leave. Then he will have to go
up to the Thompson House house meeting because their RHs are leaving this
weekend, and it will be collectively RHed by the other RHs.
Thompson kids may start coming to our study breaks, like orphans. (Which will
be melted down and properly grounded.)
Tuesday, 8 PM, May 2: THE LOTTERY - you must have your pink housing card.
Except for Kate. Except not. You don't have to fill it out, just bring it. If
you lose it before Monday, go to the housing office; if you go on Monday or
Tuesday, they will laugh at you.
Thursday, 7:30 PM - Pierce lottery. This is the place to go if you want to
defect to another house, traitor.
May 9, 10 - 8 PM - general lottery.
Oh, Henderson RHs are leaving too. That means Shorey RHs are the only ones
staying.
Final HARK (sp?) meeting will be May 15, HARK officers will be elected for next
year.
Nobody cares about IHC's "roommate game". It's really stupid.
Chris the RM will be leading a trip to the Oriental institute. He's very
knowledgeable about near-East stuff. Saturday May 6 11 AM. Then an open house
May 19 at 4:30. Go there and do tricks! Or something.
"Race, culture, and civility" will be an experimental Chicago Life meeting that
will be held next year. If you want to subject the incoming first years to
this, tell Bill.
The Fire Marshal is coming! Get stuff out of the hall unless you want him to
come by again!
So... Brazilian Jujitsu? Bill can't teach us himself ( :( ), but he can get us
instructors. He taught Alex some moves, and she had to register her right hand
because now it's a Lethal Weapon.
Bill leaves, Sean takes over.
PTC: They did nothing. Spamalot sheet is still up.
You can ask Colleen about the discipline system or the lottery. Or about the
roommate game, though I would advise against that.
A New Day and Hollie won the election. Boo.
Alex: We have $500 not yet in the bank that the University can't stop us from
using (they don't spend money on "dangerous things"). We could go next saturday
at 7 PM. It'd be about $20 or $25 per person. Or Sunday at 3. Check the
listhost. Email Alex if you have questions.
Quoth Ensu (sp?): She's running a study, it takes 2 minutes to complete and
pays a dollar. Honestly, I thought it was confusing. She lived in Tufts last
year, by the way.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Sean nominates Lulu! Lulu hates Sean and tells Colleen to hit him. Lulu leaves
the room before the story is told. Lulu was talking to Emily and Maria. "Don't
you think that skirt's a little short, Lulu? If you're dancing on the table,
people might see a little too much." "If I'm dancing on the table, I won't
really care." Well, at Psi U, Lulu was dancing on the table, fell off, and her
skirt fell off as well! She had to be escorted out.
No other nominations, Lulu wins.
HERO OF THE WEEK:
Ian makes a stupid nomination for himself. I won't even say what it is.
Toney suggests the Lulu Care Team; it wins unopposed.
--------------------------------------------
House meeting is over, but nobody disperses.
QUARTER 3 WEEK 6
Girl Alex is here first (except for me) and wants to start without anyone else.
There is actually house snack!
--------------------------------------------
Bill asks: Does anyone else (i.e. other than him himself) want to plan
paintball?
Announcement by Elibet: Does anyone have a blank cassette? (That's more of a
question, but...)
Sean throws a (nonempty) soda bottle in response. She throws it back, doesn't
even nearly hit.
PTC: There are still only 3 Tuftsians going to Spamalot. If you want to go to a
White Sox game with 20 people from Henderson, it's only $3. It's Monday of 8th
week.
IHC: The dining hall be redesigned. Does it really matter? Probably not. They
have promised to bring the food up to par with the other dining halls (Pierce
has consistently ranked lowest), but I remain skeptical.
Grant points out that the dining hall will be black-and-white next year.
Bill says the kitchen will be open, so you can see what they're doing to your
food. I assume this was a joke, but Mark believed it.
Email Aaron of Shorey (Aaron Shorey?) if you want to apply to manage TANSTAAFL;
eventually it will be voted on.
$40 are allocated for food bought at Whirlyball, Bill also wants $10 to pay back
Sean; the latter fails.
Says Boy Alex: Since the weather is getting nice, anyone want to picnic?
Bill suggests the point; Mark suggests North Field.
Kate says it will be sunny tomorrow; $50 are allocated for a barbeque tomorrow.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Apparently there's a story about May that can't be told.
Michael Toney nominates Kenneth. Kenneth went to a party at Shoreland with some
hot girls, makes himself about 5 mixed drinks, each about half alcohol. He
somehow makes his way back to Tufts. He says repeatedly, "Dude, I'm not
supposed to be this drunk!" Sayer asks him if he'll remember this in the
morning; he says there's about a 75% chance. Then he starts shouting
percentages at people. "Mark, you get 85%!" "What percentage do I get?" "You
get 60%!" He tries to play Smash but all he can do is press the start button.
Sometime later Toney finds him in a bathroom stall, throwing up. He brags about
how he's never thrown up anywhere he's not supposed to; he then passes out.
Michael realizes this, wakes him up, but Kenneth doesn't want to leave. "It's
so comfortable! It hurts to move..." So Toney starts climbing over the wall to
get him out. Kenneth, realizing this, slides out underneath, leaving the stall
locked behind him; it remained locked for several days thereafter. Also, the
next day, 12 hours later, he was still drunk. "Did I take my clothes off before
or after Michael Toney left?" After.
Even so, Mark nominates Toney for undressing Kenneth. Mark also nominates the
Bears for their draft picks. Kenneth wins by a landslide.
Something is said about May; I can't make it out and it gets no votes.
HERO OF THE WEEK:
Kyle is nominated for his blood drive; Sean refuses to acknowledge this,
insisting it's a pyramid scheme run by Dracula. Michael was nominated for
taking care of Kenneth. Kyle wins.
--------------------------------------------
Someone has been stealing things and sliding them through the grate into the
beer room. Also, there is a shaft in the beer room that runs from this floor up
to the 10th!
I think I missed a bunch of stuff.
Hilary won't donate her blood, but she'll sell it. Sean points out that she's
selling her body.
I really think I missed a bunch of stuff. In fact I'm deliberately ignoring
this, too much is being said. However, Grant insists I record the following:
Bill: I got $5 on me; if you can give me a pint of blood, I don't care how you
get it out of you.
Grant suggests that the X-Men theme be the official house theme. Hilary (?)
suggests Since You've Been Gone. I suggest Gourmet Race 1 from Kirby Superstar.
This falls apart but it becomes suggested that next year the house shirt read
"Just one more game."
QUARTER 3 WEEK 7
House snack is chips, thanks to Sean.
--------------------------------------------
SIGN UP FOR PAINTBALL! The most important announcement of this meeting, hands
down. It's Sunday the 28th. Note that we have the 29th off.
The tire swing hole will be fixed over the summer.
Bill: Fiona and I have air conditioning now, so when it gets too damn hot, don't
come near our apartment.
Rachel: Saturday and Sunday, 8:00, burlesque show. Rachel is in it. "I don't
know how much it is, but it's probably fairly cheap." Also, 19th and 21st,
there's some sort of dance show, $7.
Sean: Rachel's a hooker who wants to be a dancer.
Ian: White Sox game - if you signed up, you need to talk to Ian.
Kate is confused.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK
Sean: Do we even need to hold a vote?
Sam is additionally nominated, just for show.
Chris still wins with no vote.
HERO OF THE WEEK
Jacob, again with no vote.
--------------------------------------------
Also, remember, it's ScavHunt, everyone! http://mcp.rh/ for the current status.
QUARTER 3 WEEK 8
--------------------------------------------
Bill: They have steam-cleaned the carpets, yay.
Sean: It still smells funny and it's still mildewy.
Ian Bailey isn't staying for house meeting.
Paintball is the Sunday of Memorial Weekend.
Bill makes a PROMISE:
If, in the last week that you are here, no-one gets kicked out of housing,
no-one does anything that makes Fiona and I totally crazy, I *will* moon the
housing office.
(Remember, that's a promise!)
Pavel: Can we all moon the housing office?
Sean: Sure, do it every day as you go to class!
PTC: Every Tufts person has backed out of every single event.
The new TANSTAAFL manager's name is Calvin. Apparently Toney was going to live
with him.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Other Sean wins Weenie of the Week, no contest.
HERO OF THE WEEK:
Emily Feldman, for turning off the water on Friday. Also Lucas and Hilary, for
doing the same on Thursday. Again, no need for a vote.
QUARTER 3 WEEK 9
Mark brings Depot!
--------------------------------------------
Oh crap! I'm late! Well, all the announcements I missed will be repeated next
week. They regard moving out, SFAICT.
Paintball, Saturday: Probably $10 per person? Bring money to buy ammo.
7:30 AM we are leaving! Get up and get on the bus, you can sleep on the bus.
The bus will be on University Avenue. Lunch is involved somehow.
NEW RHs: Bill (no, not the same Bill) and Dave. Yes, they're a gay couple.
Bill (current Bill): Everything bad about you I'm telling them, and making up a few stories.
One of them is a *real doctor*. The other is working towards some sort of PhD
(in Kicking Your Ass, perhaps?). Unfortunately, though Alex is stalking them,
she's not allowed to tell us anything.
Emily Tancer: We have $1811, yay! And we're *still* selling T-shirts (whoops,
almost wrote "teachers" there). 2-hour shifts.
Ian: Can I get reimbursed for the air freshener? (No.) Also, somebody stole my
carpet.
Aaron has ordered 4 new controllers, yay! Reimbursed.
Jacob says he wants more Yobos.
As for camping... after a bunch of noise, it fails.
No No-Holds-Barred-Fighting classes on house money, unfortunately; even though
it's self-defense, it's still too dangerous.
The unofficial T-shirts should be in tomorrow.
Sean will make donuts! Hooray! But when? Monday at 22:00!
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Sean nominates Chris for vomiting on Psi U's window.
Any other stories? Nope. Chris's story is lame but it's all we have; win by
default.
Hilary nominates Mark for hero, firstly for bringing Depot, secondly for going
home with a third-year Friday night.
Mark: Her name's Depot.
Kenneth: Actually, it's The Football.
--------------------------------------------
T-shirts must be sold as we are in debt! Oh no! I don't understand how it is
that we both have $1811 *and* are in debt, but whatever...
QUARTER 3 WEEK 10
Bill insists that the new RH is getting a PhD in History, not Kicking Your Ass.
RHs do not get successively tougher.
You must be out on 3 PM on Saturday 10 June! Last meal Friday 9 June!
If you have stuff in storage, you have to get it out of storage now (then put it
back afterward). There will be specific storage hours - if you're not living
here next year, you cannot store stuff here! You can't store stuff in Tufts's
storage room, construction workers will steal it.
Ben says: X-men!
You will give the desk clerk your name and she will sign you out on the
computer. You have to clean your room, also - if your room is found to be too
dirty, you will be charged $25 minimum. This is a new policy. Lock your
windows and doors.
Bill: You guys are letting Ben steal your microwave. I have no vested interest
in this. He can take it and pee on it so far as I care.
Ben: Yes!
Doug: Can we throw it off the parking garage that might be across the street?
Bill: Why are you making *that* the hypothetical? I *know* that the parking
garage is across the street.
Says Sean: PTC closed out the year, nothing much happened. Sean would also like
to apologize for the closing of TANSTAAFL, it's out of his control, his
employees just chose not to show up. It'll be back open come Sunday.
Doug: Ben, if you don't stop pushing that goddamn button I'm going to come down
there and rip your fucking hand off.
Why aren't the new RHs here? One's on the other side of the country, and one's
a douche.
--------------------------------------------
WEENIE OF THE WEEK:
Chris Powers nominates Ben for his microwave antics.
Doug nominates May for Paintball. Bill and May approach Pavel, the only one
left on his team, from behind. Bill points his gun at Pavel and tells him to
surrender. Pavel responds by getting shot by May.
Ben wins.
HERO OF THE WEEK:
Ben wants to nominate himself for going to a wedding. WTF?
Doug announces that if you don't have your "Where sobriety comes to die" shirt,
come to him and get it.
A bunch of people leave, I think the meeting's over... but apparently not, as
Boy Alex nominates Vivian for helping him with his music final. Yay, we have a
winner.
Holy crap! Ben just put a VHS cassette in the microwave! For like 3 minutes!
Ben insists it smells like popcorn.
Kenneth: Oh God, it's smoking!
Chris stops it with a minute left.
(There was no house meeting finals week.)
-Sniffnoy
